This is what I've been dealing with for over a week, maybe 2 weeks now. I've done everything I should, I've switched out my insulin pump infusion sites on my stomach more frequently, I've changed infusion sets, I've changed insulin, I've waited 15-20 even sometimes 30 minutes after giving a mealtime insulin bolus before eating…. None of it has worked. Since I don't know what is going on with my cycle and I'm really not sure when or if I'm going to start I thought maybe it was because I would start my period in the next week or so, over the weekend I played it off to maybe it’s cause I was getting a cold, (it hasn't really turned into anything). Also over the weekend we were out of town visiting family and I played if off to being off schedule and maybe lack of sleep. Today, being back and on my normal routine and after evaluating everything that I've done since these stupid highs have kicked in and going over my meter logs and my Dexcom logs I decided it was high time to contact my diabetes BFF, my CDE. From somewhere around 10:30 this morning until after 3:30 this afternoon I was high, as in 200’s almost 300's high. I felt like crap, tired, groggy, emotional, head kinda heavy and foggy, and sick to my stomach, peeing like a racehorse and wanting to chug enough water to fill the Mississippi. I needed to take action because nothing I have been doing is working. I've been kicking up the temporary basal rates on my pump anywhere from 30-65% higher than normal and the highs are still really ugly. I sent my, Dexcom logs, my meter logs, and my daily insulin totals over to my CDE and told her everything I've been doing. Even though I had told her two weeks ago when I last sent in all my logs that my infertility specialist, Dr. O, had put me on Letrozole, I reiterated this again. I heard back from her almost immediately, she had missed it two weeks ago when I told her I had been on Letrozole and she apologized profusely. Even though it’s been 3 weeks since I was on it and I only take it for 5 days it apparently wreaks havoc on my BGS and will make my need for insulin increase, it causes an increase in insulin resistance!!! Oh joy! This is what I have to deal with now for a bit each month now until I do get pregnant and while taking Letrozole once a month. She says she can see the huge difference for my need for more insulin since I talked to her two weeks ago. She increase my basal rates and my lunch and dinner time insulin to carb ratios drastically. I’m to touch base with her every few days now to get things tight and were they should be again and she said to check, check, check my BGs often. I felt relieved that I now knew I had really been doing everything right and like I should, but I felt guilty for letting it go for so long and not contacting her sooner. As excited as I'd be to find out I'm pregnant I'm not sure if I'd scream and laugh with excitement or burst into tears of frustration and fear of what these highs may have done to a baby. When I say that I've been running high I don't mean just here and there, I mean it's the majority of the day for hours on end. I can wait the amount of time that I should between taking insulin and eating and once that food kicks in it's almost as if I've not taken any insulin. Maybe not quite to that extreme because if that were the case I'd have ended up in the hospital I'm sure. I guess this is just a tiny sneak peak of what the later part of a pregnancy for me will be like. I was feeling quite discouraged this afternoon with all of this and had sent out a text to some good close friends that I could use some prayers cuz I wasn't doing so hot with all this. I got some nice encouragement back and even when I got home from work Brad offered to stay home with me tonight from the worship band that he plays on on Monday nights, if I needed emotional support and because I wasn't feeling so great. It was very sweet of him but I told him no, no need. I'm thankful that I have these people in my corner. It was a day I needed to know that even though no one I know understands, they are still there cheering me on and rooting for me as I fight this fight.
Monday, March 31, 2014
Thursday, March 27, 2014
I OVULATED!!!! THE MEDICINE WORKED!!!!!!!!
As I wrote about here, it’s been a rough go of things. After almost a month now of trying to get correct test results on my hormone levels I received those on Monday. They are fine. Last week after I got a positive ovulation test both Tuesday and Wednesday I called the doctor, nurse said to get blood drawn the day before yesterday, Tuesday, to confirm if I had or had not in fact ovulated. With the way things have gone trying to get test results over the last couple of weeks I had honestly not given it much thought that I’d hear anything yesterday. I was trying to have faith but at the same time trying to mentally and emotionally prepare myself to hear that I had not ovulated. Once I heard the news from the nurse and got off the phone I really had never expected to break down like I did. But it was such a huge thing lifted off of me. I am able to ovulate!!! With a little help, it happened! Praise God! I have no idea when my next cycle should be starting since I’ve been so irregular and I had to get a different phone and my old phone had an app that I tracked everything in so I really and truly can’t even remember my last period was for sure. Hmmmm…. Well…. I’m wondering if I’m going to start next week because BGs Monday, yesterday and this afternoon have been a jerk face. I’m trying to keep at bay, now that I know I did ovulate, any fears that if I am pregnant what these craptastic BGs would be doing to a little person developing. Between reading “Balancing Pregnancy and Pre-Existing Diabetes” and now “Think Like A Pancreas” and knowing that so many woman have had healthy pregnancies and babies without the help of insulin pumps and CGMs and top perfect A1Cs’, I’m trying to just not think about what a few crazy highs could possibly do. Now that I know that this baby thing is even more of a reality of happening I think it’s time to crack down even more on myself and really get to watching what I eat and looking at patterns and what certain foods do to my BGs. I have to admit, I’ve slacked off a bit, but must not be a slacker no more!
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
To just relax and distress I’ve discovered that I can’t even break down and have a glass of wine occasionally without feeling gross afterwards. Since trying for a little human I’ve cut out caffeine and alcohol and discovered that my body hates both. Any time that I have splurged and had just a glass or two of wine or a cup of real coffee I end up regretting it. Both make me break out (even worse than I already am since being off the pill for the past year), make me miserably bloated and just do awful things to my stomach/insides area whatever that area may be. I started feeling this way a couple years ago and thought that it could be a few different things, tried cutting those out and when that didn’t work gave up. Now that I’ve given up caffeine and alcohol I know what it was, weird.
How is all this stress affecting my BGs you may ask? Well, not as awful as I would think. Thank the Lord!!! We made Rubin sandwiches on Monday for dinner and then I brought one yesterday for lunch and I’m pretty sure that the carb count on the rye bread wrapper is WRONG! I was stinking high all night Monday and yesterday afternoon. I thought maybe Monday was a fluke so I brought the same thing for lunch yesterday and that just confirmed my suspicions. Today I was hanging around 140 all morning and couldn’t get down until after lunch, but 140’s are better, much better than 180-220’s from Monday night and Tuesday afternoon so I’ll take it.
On the brighter side of things, and by brighter I mean literally, since it was hovering around 50 degrees today and although it was cloudy, I was wearing a bright coral sweater cardigan thingy. I know, kinda lame way to be more chipper, but since I’m wearing it and it’s been months because of the cold and I haven’t worn it this just means we are that much closer to spring right? Also, Lexie, my Dexcom CGM has been spot on with my meter and it’s 10 days that I’ve been sporting this sensor so that’s a really bright spot . Yay for that! We’ll see what tomorrow brings, praying I really do get a call with test results from the nurse tomorrow and praying that they are good. Sitting on pins and needles………….
Thursday, March 13, 2014
Update to add since I've been writing this over the last 5 days... I got a call today from the nurse at the doctor's office regarding one of the hormone tests that they said was all good. Apparently the lab is now informing them that they screwed up and that one of the tests was done incorrectly. I have to go back to have my blood redrawn and tested. I already finished the ovulation meds for this cycle and I told the nurse that, she said that it won't hurt anything. Just when I was feeling sure about things.
Thursday, March 6, 2014
I didn’t spend two hours at the office with the first 20-30 minutes in the waiting room, 10 minutes with a nurse and 10-15 with the doctor and the rest in the exam room or hall way waiting to be seen. That was how it was every time at my old endo’s. Her staff was all very friendly and helpful. I got to my appointment 15 minutes early to fill out paperwork and didn’t even sit there the full 15 before being called back. Nurse did her thing and then the doctor came in within 5 minutes to see me. She was very friendly and detailed, she communicates with her patients via email she said and will respond after hours including weekends. Ok, that’s pretty cool as long as it’s true. She did a very thorough physical exam which my old doc never did. I was there for about an hour and a half and she spent 95% or so of that time with me. Maybe because I’m a new patient and because she asked a ton of questions and input lots of information into the computer, maybe she wouldn’t always spend so much time with me, I don’t know. She sounds like she really knows what she is talking about regarding my thyroid and Diabetes Insipidus (DI) issues as well and will treat me for the DI and I can stop seeing the nephrologists once a year.
When I told her that before having my Dexcom CGM that I checked my BG 10+ times a day on average and now that I have it it’s a bit more like 6 or so times a day that I check she called me “a bit obsessive compulsive” and that I’m letting "diabetes overrun" my life. I need to step back and enjoy my life, not obsess over numbers.
She made me feel awful about my carb counting abilities and when I talked about SWAGing (scientific wild a** guess) said I need to stop SWAGing and start eating meals where there is no guessing. (I don’t do prepackaged/boxed anything, most things are from scratch with the exception of breads and tortillas and of course pasta and rice.) She also said that I’m not eating enough carbs. I need to eat more than my normal average of 90-130 carbs for all three meals combined.
I’ll give it to her, that maybe I need to stop overriding what my pump says on how much insulin I need, she didn’t like at all how much I tend to override my pump, but I feel like I know my body pretty well and don’t quite trust the machine as much as I should.
When she saw graphs from my pump, she really wouldn’t look at anything on my Dexcom graphs even though the nurse printed them out, she didn’t like any of the highs and lows and when she asked about them she didn’t like that I couldn’t remember what I had eaten or activates I had done 24hours before those rises and dips. She straight up told me that if I can’t remember what I did 24 hours before the high or low she can’t help me get things corrected. Really?!!! She was asking about things from a month ago!
Monday, March 3, 2014
I don't get it. How does that work? How in the world have I had nearly perfect blood sugars all day? You see that nasty high over night? That's been my life lately. Today has been a much needed break. About as close to a diabetes vacation as a person could get, but it's still never far from my mind. Now I'm praying my late dinner of beef stew didn't mess these beautiful numbers up.
Sunday, March 2, 2014
Makes one large soup pot
What you need:
1 medium red onion
2 large garlic cloves
2 seeded jalapenos
3 medium size carrots
4 celery stalks
7 15oz cans of black beans drained
6 cups Veggie broth
1 16oz jar of salsa Verde
1 can of green chilies
Coconut oil - just enough to coat the pot
2 handfuls of dried cilantro
1 lime used for zest and juice
1 1/2 tsp chili powder
1 tsp garlic powder
2 tsp cumin
1 tsp paprika
1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
salt and pepper to taste
If you have any bell peppers on hand I'm sure that those would be great added, but for once I didn't have any.
Coat the bottom of your stock pot/soup pot with oil and turn on medium heat. While that's heating throw your onion and garlic cloves into a food processor until diced. (If you don't have a food processor finely dice your veggies and maybe even let them simmer longer to be sure that they are softened enough.) Add onion and garlic to hot oil and let onions caramelize. Next get the carrots, celery and jalapenos into the food processor until well diced. Add these to the caramelized onions. Add 3 cups of the broth to the veggie mixture in the pot letting simmer for approx 20 minutes stirring occasionally. You want these veggies be cooked very well so that they are hardly noticeable in the soup. Add all remaining ingredients: beans, broth, salsa, chilies, lime zest, lime juice cilantro and spices. Let simmer another 20-30 minutes until beans are softened.
Garnish with additional cilantro, avocado, sour cream and cheese if you like and enjoy!