Wednesday, October 29, 2014

How Things Have Been...25 Weeks

Wow, I didn't realize that it had been so long since I've written.

I'm 25 weeks today!

Everything is going great! At least now that I've gotten over sickness, colds and infections that I dealt with for a while. It's amazing how great blood sugars can be when those don't come in to play. Not that I haven’t started struggling with insulin resistance because I have.

I think I talked a bit about my increasing insulin needs in a prior post or two. They have defiantly increased. As of the changes that my CDE and I made this week I am at 18 more basal units (insulin pumping through my pump into me on a 24/7 basis) of insulin a day than I was prior to pregnancy. This does not include the increased insulin to carb ratios for meals and snacks that we have made. We are at the point of making changes on a more regular basis. We are defiantly making changes every week and sometimes twice a week if not more. I was freaking out for a while thinking how quickly and hard it seemed that insulin resistance was hitting me, but unfortunately/fortunately not sure which, I got cold/sickness twice in a month’s time that screwed with things pretty hard core and made my BGs all wack! Now that I'm over all of that things are "better". Like I said, we did increase some basal rates this week, so my needs are increasing but since getting over sickness, numbers haven't been nearly as terrifying as they were. I'm learning that about 2-3 days prior to any kind of symptoms of sickness showing that my BGs will spike more often and have a much harder time coming down. It seemed that one of the last day of my cold was one of the worst too. I think I felt awful that day not just because of the cold but because my BGs hung in the mid 200's most of the day and I just felt like crap from that. Between those and the emotional toll it took that day and the worry over baby girl, that was a really tough day. After that, it was like a switch flipped and my cold symptoms lessened drastically and my BGs started to come back into line.

Since I last wrote, we came up with a name. Nora Joy. I'm happy to be calling her by her name now. I had my last ultrasound last week, it was a fetal echo. They took an intense look at her heart, but she really didn't want to cooperate at first. She had her arms and legs up over her head and her butt sticking up so the tech was having a really hard time getting a good look at Nora's heart. The tech had me try emptying my bladder, lay on my side for a while and neither worked. She tried for at least a good 30 minutes but Nora just wouldn't move, I guess she was just too comfy. Once the tech left and right before the doctor came in to take a look then Nora moved to a perfect position. My doctor was then able to get a great look at her heart and everything else and he says we have a beautifully healthy baby girl. Right now nothing to be concerned about whatsoever. She is right on track with her growth and everything.

Monday we started our 6 week classes on Labor & Delivery, Breastfeeding, Newborn Care. With the holidays coming we really wanted to get the classes completed before and not have to be going during all the hustle and bustle and rushing of Christmas and New Years. Our first class was so so. Hubby isn’t too crazy about the fact that I’m dragging him to the classes. I think that as the weeks go on we will glean more needed info. I think that the first week was just a lot of info that I’ve already read and relayed over to hubs. I think that the breastfeeding, and newborn care portions of the class will be what we really need.

Mid December is when I start the NSTs, the none stress tests on her heart. At 37 weeks I'll be going twice a week for these. From what I understand a band is put around my belly and her heartbeat will be monitored and she’ll be monitored for movement. These sessions could last from 30 minutes, to two hours, depending on if Nora cooperates or not. I'm sure I don't have all my facts straight so once I'm actually going through all of this I'll have more specifics and details. 

We have a lot of her nursery completed, just need to get organized as well as a decorating things completed. Once we have my showers then I'll really be able to get things together in her room. I have my first shower this weekend. Can’t believe the time for it is already here.

More diabetes related.... A few Saturdays ago I had a bad day with my Dexcom sensor. I went through 3 in a 12 hour period. I changed the first one out that morning, but when I did I must have hit a blood vessel because blood just pooled up under the sensor site. I still tried to keep it in and see if it would work, but after over 8 hours of just totally inaccurate readings I knew it just wasn't going to work. My Dexcom would say I was in the 60's and really I was in the 120's. I'd try to calibrate and then it would go from saying I was low to too high. I'd get readings in the 200's for example and I was only in the 130's. I knew in order to be on top of my BGs that I had to change my sensor. Having inaccurate readings like that would only cause me to freak out and waste test strips when I really had no need for any kind of correction. I finally changed it only to have the 2nd one in for 1 hour marinating in my skin when I accidentally ripped it out of my thigh when I went to the bathroom. Third time was the charm.  That one I didn't rip out and the readings were "better". I gave it time and it eventually got pretty close to being on track. It actually became more accurate when I got closer to day 10 but I had to replace it because my skin was getting irritated. This new one that I now have in I've placed in a new spot that I've never used before. I've used my love handles but had switched to my upper front thigh saving love handle space for my insulin infusion set sites. I've been pretty happy with my thigh area as a place for my sensors, but decided it was time to change it up. I placed it closer to my back, not really sure that it's considered my love handle, maybe a bit of a muffin top? ;P I don't know, anyway, readings have been pretty spot on from the get-go! That's been pretty fantastic! At first I wasn't sure how comfortable I was having it there, but now that I'm on day 9 of having it here I've gotten accustom to it being there. Since I can't lay on my back that's not what the issue was, it was just a little uncomfortable when I'm sitting at my desk and I lean back, or when trying to roll over in bed. I was a little nervous I'd rip it out in the middle of the night trying to get comfortable, but that hasn't happened yet.

A couple of weekends ago we did our last big trip away before baby, I don't know that I'd say we went on a baby-moon. We went to LA to visit Brad's best friend and his family. Since there was no just us time, I myself wouldn't call it a baby-moon. It was a bit stressful for me, but nice to get away for a long weekend. We left on Thursday and came back on Monday. I say that it was stressful for me because being off my normal routine and eating junk most of the weekend of course threw my BGs to the sky a lot. Of course I played it off to all of that when I should know by now that it's more likely insulin resistance in my pregnancy. I finally changed some basal rates on my own Sunday morning after another night of highs that wouldn't come down. That seemed to help a lot and I wish I would have done it sooner. Since then and the changes that my CDE made when we got back things got much better. My other stress was of course airport security. Leaving wasn’t so much of an issue. I kept my pump on and went through the metal detector with no problem. Coming back…. LAX would only let mother’s with children go through the metal detectors and everyone else had to go through the full body scanners or opt for a pat down. I told them my situation hoping that they would make an exception for an obviously pregnant diabetic and they wouldn’t. So I had to wait for a pat down. That’s never fun.

I’ve been able to get back to my evening walks which have been really nice since the weather has changed and gotten really really pretty. It’s helping a bit with my BGs and I know it’s doing both of us good in more ways than just for my BGs. I'm hoping that  this gets me on a schedule so that once it's too cool for my walks I'll be in the habit of some sort of activity and I'll jump on my exercise bike. I know that Nora needs me to do this in order to help with keeping my BGs in a safer range.

Friday, September 26, 2014

Friday’s Five: Pros of Pregnancy & Diabetes

Okay, sometimes while being prego and having T1D it seems that there is no light at the end of the tunnel and maybe it was a really really really bad idea….. But not always, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and as I’ve said before and if you really do your research and talk to doctors, nurses and CDEs that actually are truly familiar with and know their stuff regarding T1 and pregnancy they will also tell that with tight control a very healthy happy pregnancy and baby are to be had!


So here are my top 5 pros of being pregnant while dealing with  diabetes…

1.       Easier places to hide an insulin pump. With a growing belly I have an easier time hiding my pump in that space between belly and hip. Even with tight shirts my pump is harder to see. One of my big apprehensions for getting a pump was that I like to wear dresses and it’s hard to find a place to hide a pump while wearing a dress. This has for the most part flown out the window. With my growing body I’ve got a bigger “pocket” or hiding place in my chest to place my pump. Now no third weird looking bump when trying to wear a dress. No one even knows!

 2.       More baby pictures!!! Having a high risk pregnancy means many more ultrasounds than that of the average mamma to be. I think I’ve heard that the average is 2-3 during the entire 9 months. I’m 20 weeks and I’ve already had 3, that’s one every 6 weeks. Now we are down to every 4 weeks!

3.       More doctor appointments. I’m sure that this will eventually get old, but I actually look forward to each doctor appointment and the close monitoring. I know that very close attention is being paid to me and baby. It’s kinda nice having all the attention focus on me for once.

4.       Healthy eating. My eating habits were not the best before my T1 diagnosis. My normal on the go meal instead of a quick salad as I might choose now was an entire Totino’s Pizza or pizza rolls. Other regular food choices included frozen burritos, fast food or a bowl of cereal. Or a box of macaroni and cheese and maybe adding a can of tuna with of course more cheese. Breakfast if I even ate it, Pop Tarts or some other sweat substance with not much real nutritional value.  Veggies, didn’t even consider them. I don’t know what my eating habits would have been like had I gotten pregnant without diabetes. Not that I wouldn’t care about taking care of my baby but the diagnosis was a huge eye opener. I can imagine that I would have really truly taken the term “eating for two” for real and kept with the fast food, and other junk food never really thinking about it. Of course fast food I’ve craved more being pregnant and I have given into those indulgences even more than I think I should or than I normally would, but I do still make veggies and healthy choices a priority. Even the cookies I made last weekend were healthier. Packed with raw sugar, but less than what was called for, organic oatmeal, ground flaxseed, almonds, raisins, cranberries and the indulgent part… semi sweet chocolate chips.

5.       Eating in moderation. Okay, so this kind of goes along with eating healthy. Since I have to watch my BGs so closely I can’t just eat what I want when I want, not even an apple or banana. Yes, I’m making sure to eat plenty for little girl as well as myself, but over eating after I’ve eaten what I’ve given enough insulin for is not really an option. At least not for me.  I’ve found for me it’s best to try not to let my eyes get bigger than my belly because I still can tend to get full quickly. So I portion out my meals and snacks and eat what I bolus insulin for. If I decide I want more, then I need to bolus more insulin and wait 15-20 minutes for that to kick in. By the time that happens my food has most likely settled and I’d no longer want what I thought I did. Therefore, this should keep from excessive weight gain.  I know that every person, every body type is different so I know that what works for me to control weight gain like this won’t necessarily work for someone else.

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Following Doc’s Orders: Eat Frozen Yogurt

Yesterday I mentioned in my last post that I was considering going low carb to maybe help with the insulin resistance in pregnancy. That afternoon I ate lunch a little later than usual but my BGs spiked before even eating lunch and I waited about 40 minutes after taking my insulin before eating. Even still with the waiting and accurate amount of insulin I still spiked up to 208 about 2 hours after lunch. Frustrating. I emailed my CDE asking for her advice on going low carb and she called me not long after to talk to me and answer any questions and try to ease my fears. Since I haven’t mentioned it lately, I still think she’s great! I have such a great support system with both her and my high risk OB. They are pretty fantastic. Anyway, so this is what I learned and she said about low carbing it. Being prego going low carb is a big NO NO! She said that it’s not healthy for me or the baby. There are nutrients in the carbohydrate foods that both of us need. Those are things that I pretty much figured but I had read that some T1D pregos have done the low carb thing to help minimize the highs. I don’t care how much insulin I need to take, I’ll take whatever is needed to work, I’m not trying to avoid taking insulin, I’m trying to avoid the highs. What I did learn from Deb is that apparently the minimum requirement for pregnant women on a daily basis is 160 grams of carbs. Now, if you are not diabetic and have never paid attention to carb counts I’m sure that sounds like a lot, but really it’s not at all. If you are a regular soda drinker one can of soda typically has about 35-45 grams of carbs. An everything bagel from Trader Joe’s has a total of 60 grams of carbohydrate, 1 individual serving size bag of Cheeze-its has 25 grams of carbohydrate. A peanut butter protein Kind Bar has 17 grams, and a Burger King Whopper Jr and small fry has 76 grams of carbohydrate total. I know that these are random food items, but see, I’m hoping that those items help you to see how easy it is to eat way more than 160 grams of carbs in a day. Deb told me that if I do want to stay on the low end of the carb spectrum that she would like for me to ration out my carbs this way:

Breakfast (because it can be the worst meal of the day to send BGs sky high): 30 grams

Morning snack: 15 grams

Lunch: 45 grams

Afternoon snack: 15 grams

Dinner: 45 grams

Evening snack: 30

I have been having about 30 grams of carbs as an evening snack in a mug of frozen yogurt. I’ve found that either the brand Skinny Cow ice cream or frozen yogurt do not mess with my BGs the way regular ice cream or frozen custard does. It’s a total miracle! I hadn’t admitted to Deb that I was already eating that just about every night, but after she told me the breakdown of the least amount she would like for me to eat as I listed above she went on to say to enjoy food. Stop stressing, that this is going to happen, my insulin needs will continue to increase and we will get it worked out. She said to eat fun things. She is the one that actually brought up and encouraged me to eat Skinny Cow bars! That’s when I admitted to my indulgence and she said I should try plane vanilla frozen yogurt with pumpkin pie spice. I did and it’s to die for. She also said that if I want something close to apple pie to chop up an apple, microwave it until soft and add pumpkin pie spice to that as well. I will be trying this one FYI! 

 Altho I have her tips and “ permission” and her encouragement does make me feel a bit better. I did end up spiking after the frozen yogurt last night and wouldn't come down to under 140 till almost 4 this morning.  I’ll be sending her my numbers later today for more adjustments because I’m really not happy with how yesterday and the night before looked. You know the t-shirts that say “Stay Calm…” with whatever after it? I need one that says “Stay Calm and dose insulin and enjoy your food”. Here’s to insulin resistance and pregnancy! I’ll do my best as always, and keep eating to keep little girl fed.
***As usual, these are just my opinions, thoughts and what my doctor/CDE has told me. I am not a medical professional in any way shape or form. If your doctor, nurse or CDE says something different, please follow their advice or ask them questions regarding anything that I have written. Please do not take any of what I say as medical advice.***

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

It's A!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We’re having a…………!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



No names yet that we can agree upon so right now I’m calling her my little joy most of the time, if not that then just baby girl.


I know that it’s been a while since I’ve written. Not a whole lot new to tell. I’ve been blessed that I still haven’t have a lot of the normal pregnancy issues. My biggest issue for the last week has been really bad back pain already. I’m carrying her all in the front, belly and boobs and I guess it’s messing with my back already. Between my back hurting and not being able to get comfy in bed, peeing at least 3 times a night and my Dexcom waking me up to alert me to highs and lows I’m not getting the amount of sleep that I should. Which I know is messing with my BGs. But so far I’m thankful I haven’t been as sleepy as I’d have thought. With my back hurting the way it is, and then when I had the cold just a bit before that I’m not getting to go on my walks or work out or do yoga the way I had hoped to continue during pregnancy. We’ve also been incredibly busy around the house between getting Brad’s office moved to the basement and turning that into her nursery and then at the same time renovating the bathroom. Although I haven’t really been able to help with any of that, between going to look at and pick up items for the bathroom in the evenings and trying to stay on top of house work I’m having a hard time trying to find time to attempt yoga or anything anyway. I think it would help my back a lot and my BGs…. Which leads to the next subject.   I’m already starting to head into the insulin resistance part of my pregnancy. That’s been a whole lot of fun. I’ll be 20 weeks tomorrow, so half way there if not more already! Depending on if she comes early or not. It’s flying by! Between an infection and a cold I had a few weeks back at first I wasn’t sure if I was already developing insulin resistance until my doctor discovered the infection via blood/urine test and then the following week I developed a cold.  After that I seemed to be in the clear for a little bit longer, but about week 17 or so I started noticing higher numbers and my need for more insulin. At times I think it’s not freaking me out the way I thought it would but then there are times like last night as I was laying in bed trying to read and seeing my numbers climb despite the basal rate changes that my CDE made to my evening rates yesterday I tear up and start praying my heart out that these crazy BGs don’t affect baby girl. I try to remember that it’s not the short term high but the long term that will hurt her, but it’s still not pleasant to be going through. With last night and even today’s numbers not being what I want to see I’ll probably be sending my numbers into my CDE again Thursday if not tomorrow. I don’t think that waiting until next Monday will be a good idea. I’m contemplating switching to a low carb diet if I’m going to have real issues with getting things under control. Up until now I’ve been doing really well and had a fantastic A1C. Last month it was 5.6 which was a record for me. Last week when I got blood work done it came back as 5.1!!! That’s amazing and that what I’m trying to hold onto and pray I can continue through the rest of my pregnancy.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

While Keeping THE Secret-Week 10

As of yesterday I'm 18 weeks! Wow how time is flying by. Next Thursday we find out if Baby is a boy or a girl! So excited for that. I can't believe the we are only 2 weeks away from the half way point! For all we know we could have already hit the half way point if I have to go early, but Lord willing I will be able to go up to the full 40 weeks and let little one come naturally with no induction.

Here is what was going on at 10 weeks....

July 16, Week 10:

Wow! Today is officially the first day of week 10 and boy do I feel like a COW! So far I have not had a constant desire to devour everything in front of me. So far I’ve felt way too bloated and get really full really quickly that I can’t eat much in one sitting. This is something to get accustom to because I have unfortunately forgotten at times that I can only eat so much, pre-bolus before eating and then I get full really fast with more insulin on board than the food that I thought I would be able to eat. Then of course I drop and I have to chug juice or something. This is the first day that I have really been eating what feels like eating for 2 may feel like, but it’s not because I’m really hungry. Yes, I have been hungrier today than I feel like I have in 10 weeks, but my BGs keep going down. I know that the typical type 1 will start getting crazy excessive lows between weeks 8-9, and I guess I’ve had more than before but I kinda think that’s because I’m so afraid of highs right now and I know that I’m over calculating carbs and insulin, which I know is also not a good thing at all. So today, I’ve grazed, and grazed and grazed. I know I’ve read that for the typical woman it’s best to eat 6 small meals a day or to eat every 2 hours to help with this bloating/full issue. This is where the issue with T1D comes in. To make sure that not too much or too little insulin is on board and to make sure that BGs stay steady and not roller coaster or run high it’s best for someone like me to eat every 3 to 4 hours, not every two. Today, that’s not really been possible. I’ve been snacking every 2 hours at least, if not every hour. I don’t want to put anything else in me, but as I watched my Dexcom screen earlier my BG was slowly creeping down again. I ate a handful of potato chips and that seems to have finally kicked in because I’m now going up a bit. I know, my last choice of snack not the best but I really am trying to stay as healthy and nutritious as possible with my snack/meal/and low treatment choices as I possibly can. This has been hard because veggies are gross to me right now, really really gross. I can eat something one day and the next I almost lose my stomach if I don’t get away from the smell/sight of it fast enough. Thankfully, this is the extent of sickness for me. I really am not having too bad of an issue with sickness, it’s just veggies/salads that I’m really struggling with. I hate that, because I so want to eat healthy and get the best nutrients that I can and being disgusted by veggies just stinks. (Literally) So today since I’ve been grazing I think I’ve done pretty well staying away from the bad unhealthy things that I could be devouring. I had my normal breakfast of oatmeal with almond milk, about a 4th cup of blueberries, a table spoon of peanut butter and an orange on the side. A couple hours later it was raisins and almonds, a little after that yogurt. Not long after that was lunch of a peanut butter and honey(from a local bee keeper) on whole grain bread. Then of course I couldn’t go more than an hour after that then I had a cheese stick and some more almonds and some cashews.  Then I had the potato chips and another cheese stick. I was really hoping to go without eating something until dinner time which is usually between 6:30 and 7, but now I’m eating a Aldi Kind bar knock off. I was starting to get a tad bit queasy and now my BG is creeping back to lower 80’s again. Plus I want to get a work out in still before dinner. So back to this bloating issue…. I know I shouldn’t be showing yet, but dang this bloating is crazy! At week 8 I had two random people actually say something about when I was due. Really?! I know I had a bit of a tummy pooch before but this is just a bit of a bummer. A friend of mine who is 11 weeks ahead of me is not even showing yet, I look more preggers than she does! I think that my biggest concern along with weight gain is that if this isn’t giving the secret away then as much as I’ve eaten today may. We just told Brad’s family this past weekend. This Saturday we are telling a couple of really good friends of ours, Sunday we are telling my family and then after that we’ll start making more phone calls. There are a couple of other people I have to tell before I even tell work because I’m afraid once I tell work it will end up on social media or…. through the grape vine, my bestie growing up who still talks to the owner of the company I work for will find out that way. This is way more complicated than I imagined and we gotta start telling soon. I have my second doctor appointment tomorrow, which is actually my first prenatal appointment since the first was just the ultrasound. Which by the way, that was one of the most amazing things ever! It was such a relief to see that everything was okay. I know I don’t usually look forward to doctor’s appointments, and I’m sure I will start to get sick of them, but for right now I’m looking forward to and excited for each of the upcoming ones that I already have scheduled. I know that they will put my mind at ease. I’m really not complaining about any of this, just telling how it is for me so far as a T1D who is growing a human in her belly. Yay! This is so exciting! I think now that we have at least told Brad’s family it’s becoming more real. I’m so overwhelmed at times over the past week with happiness that I cry happy tears of joy. That’s mainly when I’m in the car and I’m listening to Jonathan David and Melissa Helser’s newest album. Some of their stuff just gets me, and I end up crying thank yous to Jesus. I’m so amazed!

Friday, September 5, 2014

What Does The Body Of A Diabetic Look Like?

What does the body of a diabetic look like?

 We come in all shapes, sizes, colors, ethnic origin, religious and social backgrounds. We are all unique, but all share some common tell tale signs. You would never know just by looking at us on a daily basis. You may not even know on a regular basis if you don’t see a diabetic managing their chronic illness. Some of us have learned an art of hiding it from you and have no desire to share this information with anyone other than close family or who they deem to be important or need to know. Others of us would like to make the world aware of our disease and educate everyone we can. You might get a glimpse of what you  might assume to be a cell phone, pager or camera but what is really an insulin pump. You would never give it a second thought, unless you where one of us, because seeing someone like us out in real life is so far and few between.  

 So what does the body of a diabetic look like?

 If you look closely you will see multitudes of very small dots on finger tips and calluses from finger sticks.
  You will see tiny dots on a stomach, sides, shoulders, legs, hips, thighs or arms. Dots from the needles of insulin injections, insulin pump infusions sites or CGM (Continuous Glucose Monitor) sites.
  You very well may see skin irritation from these sites and or the skin tape/tac that is used sometimes to keep these things in place.
  In the summer you might see a circular like tan line from a sensor and or infusion site/tape.
  Sometimes you might see a bruised vein in the arm from getting blood work done and a nurse didn’t know what they were doing or couldn’t find a vein at first.
  You might see one of us looking like we are having a hot flash or a dazed and confused look on our face due to a sever blood sugar low reaction.
  You might see a bruise or a scrape on a body part that was a wound from a clumsy mistake that was made during a blood sugar low.
  Occasionally you may see a bruise from an insulin injection, insulin pump infusion site or CGM site that developed after a blood vessel was hit during the process of trying to stick the need in the correct spot.

I started thinking about these things this afternoon after I for some reason decided to count the little dots on my love handles and stomach. Since I use my sides more often than my stomach I only had 6 dots on my stomach and 10 dots on my left side and 16 on my right. Most are pretty faded, but they are still there. I also have a couple of tan marks from my infusion sites from the last weekend when we were at the lake and I’m sure to have a tan mark on my thigh when I remove my sensor that I’ve had on for quite some time.  
Are there other physical signs not listed that you get or have?

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

While Keeping THE Secret-Day Before The Big Day: Week 7

I'm 16 weeks today!!! Baby is now the size of an avocado!!!

But here is what was going on at 7 weeks...Be warned, I'm pretty blunt and honest about my fears and worries in this one and some may find it offensive...

7 Weeks and 6 days: Monday June 30

Tomorrow is the BIG day! It’s the day that I’ve been waiting for since we found out. I’m so excited, yet nervous and apprehensive. I just want to know that everything is okay. I know that is how I will be each and every time we have an appointment, but it will put my mind at ease just a bit for a afterwards if, God willing everything checks out okay with every ultrasound, every test.

 I was thinking about it today, how all mamas to be worry, but how much more I have to be concerned over. I was talking to someone the other day who had had a miscarriage and they said that it had never even occurred to them that would even be a possibility for them. Unfortunately that has been one of many fears that I have. I'm not sure how many nightmares I've had about it. As awful as this sounds, part of me would rather that happen than have something be seriously wrong. I know that no one wishes for any kind of issues with their baby, but I feel like I’m praying hourly for our little jalapeno. (That a huge craving, spicy and jalapenos. So I'm nick naming little one jalapeno) It’s been tough for me too because for some reason I’m having real issues with getting my BGs in line. This early on I didn't expect to have an issue. I’m trying so hard and yet…. For example it’s been that I bolus for a meal, my BGs drop before I’m even finished with my meal, they finally get to a safer range maybe an hour or more after I've finished my meal only sometimes after downing a juice. I then wait for a safe BG to show up, once I see a number that I’m more comfortable with I then bolus for the juice or whatever sugary substance I put into my system. Then maybe 2-4 hours after I've eaten, my BGs climb, and climb and climb. Most of the time I still have too much insulin on board to do a correction so it’s either I jump on my stationary bike or do a work out of some sort. That will usually help, but then it still takes some time and eventually correction boluses and then it’s never a smooth landing. It’s usually a crash and the process starts all over again. I’m getting fed up and it’s scary. I worry about what is going on inside of me. I talked to my CDE about this last week. She gave me some assurance and I’m hoping after tomorrow’s ultrasound and seeing the doctor and the tune ups that my CDE added to my pump today, that I’ll feel better about things. When I talked to my CDE last week she said that this early some women do have insulin resistance, not all, but some women do have it before the season of lows start to kick in and hang out between 8-20 weeks. She said that at this point with progesterone production getting kicked into high gear that can be the cause of insulin resistance. I’m thinking that on top of that the reason that I’m bottoming out so soon after taking my meal time insulin is possibly something I read recently. I read that it takes the body longer to metabolize food when pregnant due to how the body is pulling nutrients from the food for the baby. That has me wondering if that is why it's taking longer for my BGs to go high after meals instead of right away and my insulin that I took for the meal is already waning from my system. I've never heard of any of this in any of the books or anything that I've read on Type 1 and pregnancy so I really don't know. I had never hear or read what my CDE told me either so I find that quite odd. I'm definitely bringing all this up at my appointment tomorrow. I'm sitting here, trying not to freak out about how I'm seeing my BGs climb right now and wondering what to do. Am I too high to go work out? This number is ugly and making me mad. I'm trying to trust in the Lord and realize He is in control of this growing little one anyway and He knows what He is doing. I know that this is just the beginning of a new and difficult journey, a journey that I have prayed for so I'm just try to be thankful. Thankful that I haven't had much in the way of morning sickness at all, that my energy has been higher that I would ever expect and that I'm mainly just dealing with cramping, sore chest, craving for spicy food and a few food aversions. Which is also not the best thing, I'm craving all unhealthy awful for me food, like fast food and I gag at my healthy favorites. Cooked greens of any kind, asparagus, brusssle sprouts, spinach, green beans, they all gag me. Avocado is a wild card and I LOVE avocado! Onions are a huge no no and eggs for breakfast, can't even think about that. 

I really want tomorrow morning to hurry up and get here! In the meantime I guess I'll go work out and try and get this ugly high down.  

**My spicy and jalapeno craving have now subsided so each week baby is pretty much referred to as whatever fruit it's the size of for the week. Also, seeing the ultrasound the next day for the first time was the most amazing thing I've ever seen! Baby was just as it should be, looked to be the right size for the estimated due date and the heart rate was beautiful!***