I'm 16 weeks today!!! Baby is now the size of an avocado!!!
But here is what was going on at 7 weeks...Be warned, I'm pretty blunt and honest about my fears and worries in this one and some may find it offensive...
7 Weeks and 6 days: Monday June 30
Tomorrow is the BIG day! It’s the day that I’ve been waiting
for since we found out. I’m so excited, yet nervous and apprehensive. I just
want to know that everything is okay. I know that is how I will be each and
every time we have an appointment, but it will put my mind at ease just a bit
for a afterwards if, God willing everything checks out okay with every ultrasound, every test.
I was thinking about it today, how all mamas to be worry, but how
much more I have to be concerned over. I was talking to someone the other day
who had had a miscarriage and they said that it had never even occurred to them
that would even be a possibility for them. Unfortunately that has been one of
many fears that I have. I'm not sure how many nightmares I've had about it. As awful as this sounds, part of me would rather that
happen than have something be seriously wrong. I know that no one wishes for
any kind of issues with their baby, but I feel like I’m praying hourly for our little jalapeno. (That a huge craving, spicy and jalapenos. So I'm nick naming little one jalapeno) It’s been
tough for me too because for some reason I’m having real issues with getting my
BGs in line. This early on I didn't expect to have an issue. I’m trying so hard
and yet…. For example it’s been that I bolus for a meal, my BGs drop before I’m
even finished with my meal, they finally get to a safer range maybe an hour or
more after I've finished my meal only sometimes after downing a juice. I then
wait for a safe BG to show up, once I see a number that I’m more comfortable
with I then bolus for the juice or whatever sugary substance I put into my
system. Then maybe 2-4 hours after I've eaten, my BGs climb, and climb and climb. Most of the time I still have too much insulin on board to do a
correction so it’s either I jump on my stationary bike or do a work out of some
sort. That will usually help, but then it still takes some time and eventually correction
boluses and then it’s never a smooth landing. It’s usually a crash and the
process starts all over again. I’m getting fed up and it’s scary. I worry about
what is going on inside of me. I talked to my CDE about this last week. She
gave me some assurance and I’m hoping after tomorrow’s ultrasound and seeing
the doctor and the tune ups that my CDE added to my pump today, that I’ll feel
better about things. When I talked to my CDE last week she said that this early
some women do have insulin resistance, not all, but some women do have it
before the season of lows start to kick in and hang out between 8-20 weeks. She said that at
this point with progesterone production getting kicked into high gear that can
be the cause of insulin resistance. I’m thinking that on top of that the reason
that I’m bottoming out so soon after taking my meal time insulin is possibly
something I read recently. I read that it takes the body longer to metabolize food when pregnant due to how the body is pulling nutrients from the food for the baby. That has me wondering if that is why it's taking longer for my BGs to go high after meals instead of right away and my insulin that I took for the meal is already waning from my system. I've never heard of any of this in any of the books or anything that I've read on Type 1 and pregnancy so I really don't know. I had never hear or read what my CDE told me either so I find that quite odd. I'm definitely bringing all this up at my appointment tomorrow. I'm sitting here, trying not to freak out about how I'm seeing my BGs climb right now and wondering what to do. Am I too high to go work out? This number is ugly and making me mad. I'm trying to trust in the Lord and realize He is in control of this growing little one anyway and He knows what He is doing. I know that this is just the beginning of a new and difficult journey, a journey that I have prayed for so I'm just try to be thankful. Thankful that I haven't had much in the way of morning sickness at all, that my energy has been higher that I would ever expect and that I'm mainly just dealing with cramping, sore chest, craving for spicy food and a few food aversions. Which is also not the best thing, I'm craving all unhealthy awful for me food, like fast food and I gag at my healthy favorites. Cooked greens of any kind, asparagus, brusssle sprouts, spinach, green beans, they all gag me. Avocado is a wild card and I LOVE avocado! Onions are a huge no no and eggs for breakfast, can't even think about that.
I really want tomorrow morning to hurry up and get here! In the meantime I guess I'll go work out and try and get this ugly high down.
**My spicy and jalapeno craving have now subsided so each week baby is pretty much referred to as whatever fruit it's the size of for the week. Also, seeing the ultrasound the next day for the first time was the most amazing thing I've ever seen! Baby was just as it should be, looked to be the right size for the estimated due date and the heart rate was beautiful!***
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